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Dealing With Difficult Bridesmaids

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Connecticut Wedding Articles » Wedding Etiquette

Planning a wedding can be challenging. Sometimes a bride can have a tough time with her bridesmaids. Her bridesmaids wind up often helping her to plan so many aspects of the wedding. Many brides are grateful to their bridesmaids for all of the help that their bridesmaids give them. But some bridesmaids wind up causing a difficult time for the bride – for various reasons. Weddings can be very emotional times. A sensitive bride will know how to handle her bridesmaids effectively to find an appropriate solution to any problem.

Some bridesmaids want to be the center of attention. Am I saying that they want to be the bride? Now I wouldn’t say that…..but someone else might! They fuss about how their dress looks and where they are going to stand and what they are going to say and every detail about what they are going to do. Every action that they take is one where it seems like they are looking for more and more attention. It is true that most young women truly want to get married and find someone special of their own. This can be a challenge for the bride because she doesn’t want to hurt the bridesmaid’s feelings. But it is also the bride’s day to shine and be in the spotlight so to speak. The best way to handle this bridesmaid is to give her some type of special job. Think of her special talents and to assign her a project that keeps her busy. Then compliment her lavishly on the job that she does. The bridesmaid obviously wants attention for whatever reason – so give her some good attention that you can control!

A real challenging type of bridesmaid is the nitpicker. For her she doesn’t like the dress, she doesn’t like the shoes, she doesn’t like the wedding favors and she doesn’t like anything else. This bridesmaid may be a picky person naturally or she may have developed this personality trait just in time for the wedding. Sometimes a nitpicker bridesmaid can be very useful if she is good with details. She may pick up on something that you have missed. If she is simply a complaining type – you may need to be more direct with her and encourage her to be more positive. Or you can ask her what is wrong. She may be picking at things like shoes because she is afraid to speak her mind about other issues. The direct approach can be very useful with this type of bridesmaid.

There is another type of bridesmaid that can be a real challenge – that is the unreliable bridesmaid. You give her an errand to run and she doesn’t do it. Or you ask her to check prices with different vendors and she forgets. You simply feel like pulling your hair out. What are you going to do? Again with this issue you need to ask yourself if she is always like this or if this is a new behavior. Sometimes the bridesmaid can be overloaded with things that she needs to take care of. Other times she is just a flaky person. Sometimes a gentle reminder is all it takes for things to get done.

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